Watchtower March 10 through March 16
[For the opening song before the Public Talk, select the song number announced, on the 'Sing Out Joyfully' Page or click here]
Watchtower Study Article 2 [Press play below to hear the MP3 Watchtower audio]
Song 132 Now We Are One. Based on Genesis 2.23 and 24
1. This is at last bone of my bone,
Flesh of my flesh; now I’m not alone.
God has provided a partner,
Someone to call my own.
Now we are one; now there can be
Blessings to share for you and for me.
As man and woman together,
We are a family.
Ev’ry day we’ll serve our God above.
As he shows the way,
Unfailing love we’ll display.
As we have vowed, so may it be.
Seasons of joy, may we come to see.
Oh, may we honor Jehovah,
And may you always be my love.
[End of Song. Press Play below to play this song with Audio Description]
Husbands, Honor Your Wife (March 10 through 16)
“You husbands, . . . assign them honor.” 1 Peter 3.7.
[Box] Focus.
How a husband can honor his wife in word and action. [End of box]
Question 1. What is one reason why Jehovah created the marriage arrangement?
1. Jehovah is “the happy God,” and he wants us to be happy too.
[Quotation] 1 Timothy 1.11: according to the glorious good news of the happy God, with which I was entrusted. [End Quotation]
He has given us many gifts to help us enjoy life.
[Quotation] James 1.17: Every good gift and every perfect present is from above, coming down from the Father of the celestial lights, who does not vary or change like the shifting shadows. [End Quotation]
One of those gifts is marriage. When a man and a woman get married, they vow to love, respect, and cherish each other. Maintaining a close bond can bring them real joy.
[Quotation] Proverbs 5.18: May your own fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice with the wife of your youth. [End quotation]
Question 2. What is the state of many marriages today?
2. Sadly, many married couples in today’s world forget the promises they made on their wedding day. As a result, they are not happy. A recent report from the World Health Organization indicates that many husbands physically, verbally, or emotionally abuse their wife. A husband who does this might treat his wife respectfully in front of others but then mistreat her at home. Many marriages are also strained when a husband views pornography.
Question 3. What factors can contribute to a husband’s abusive behavior?
3. What can cause some husbands to be abusive? They may have been raised by a violent father, so they think that abusive behavior is normal. Others are influenced by the culture around them, which may promote the wrong idea that “a real man” must use force to show his wife who is the boss. Other men were not taught to control their emotions, including their anger. Some men have developed a warped view of women and sex because of regularly viewing pornography. Additionally, reports indicate that the impact of the COVID-19 pandemic has intensified these problems. Of course, none of these factors justify a husband’s abusive behavior.
Question 4. What do Christian husbands need to guard against, and why?
4. Christian husbands need to guard against adopting an improper view of women.* [Footnote] Husbands will benefit from reading the article “Do You Treat Women as Jehovah Does?” in the January 2024 issue of The Watchtower. [End of footnote] Why? One reason is that a person’s thoughts often lead to actions. The apostle Paul warned anointed Christians in Rome to “stop being molded by this system of things.”
[Quotation] Romans 12.1 and 2: Therefore, I appeal to you by the compassions of God, brothers, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, a sacred service with your power of reason. 2 And stop being molded by this system of things, but be transformed by making your mind over, so that you may prove to yourselves the good and acceptable and perfect will of God. [End Quotation]
When Paul wrote to the Romans, the congregation had evidently been in existence for some time. Yet, Paul’s words imply that some in the congregation were still being influenced by the customs and thinking of the world. That is why he exhorted them to change their thinking and behavior. That counsel certainly applies to Christian husbands today. Sadly, some of them have been influenced by the thinking of the world and have even abused their wife.* [Footnote] Victims of domestic abuse may benefit from reading the article “Help for Victims of Domestic Abuse” in the “More Topics” article series on jw.org and in JW Library®. [End of footnote] How does Jehovah expect a husband to treat his wife? We find the answer in the theme scripture for this article.
[Click to Read]|[More Topics, Help for Victims of Domestic Abuse] “Violence against women is a global public health problem of epidemic proportion, requiring urgent action,” says the World Health Organization. That organization estimates that almost 30 percent “of all women who have been in a relationship have experienced physical and/or sexual violence” by their partner. And a UN report estimates that in one recent year, 137 women died each day around the world at the hands of their partner or another family member.* [Footnote] This article refers to the victim as female, but many of the points discussed also apply to male victims. [End of Footnote] Statistics may reveal the magnitude of the problem of domestic abuse, but they cannot begin to describe the emotional and physical pain that each victim suffers. Are you a victim of domestic abuse? Or do you know someone who is? If so, consider the following points from the Bible that can help.
Domestic abuse is not your fault. What the Bible says: “Each of us will render an account for himself to God.” (Romans 14.12) Remember this: Your abuser is responsible for his actions. If your partner blames you for the abuse he inflicts, he is wrong. Wives deserve to be loved, not abused.
[Quotation] Colossians 3.19: You husbands, keep on loving your wives and do not be bitterly angry with them. [End Quotation]
At times, an abuser’s actions may be influenced by a personality disorder, his family background, or the misuse of alcohol. Even so, he is accountable to God for the way he treats you. And he is responsible to do what it takes to change his actions.
Help is available. What the Bible says: “There is accomplishment through many advisers.”
[Quotation] Proverbs 15.22: Plans fail when there is no consultation, But there is accomplishment through many advisers. [End Quotation]
Remember this: If you feel unsafe or do not know what to do, others can help. Why may you need help from others? Domestic abuse is a complex situation. When deciding how to deal with it, you may struggle to weigh factors that seem to compete with each other, such as: Your personal safety; The well-being of your children; Your financial situation; Your love for your partner.
A desire to salvage the relationship if your partner changes his actions. Naturally, you may feel confused and overwhelmed. Who can you turn to for help? A trusted friend or family member may be able to provide practical and emotional support. Talking to someone who cares for you can make a big difference. Hotlines for victims of domestic violence may offer immediate support. Those who work these hotlines can help you develop a safety plan. If your partner acknowledges his problem and sincerely wants to change, a hotline may be able to help him with the first steps he needs to take. Other emergency resources can help you if you are in immediate danger. These resources may include doctors, nurses, or other trained professionals.
You are not alone. What the Bible says: “Jehovah is close to the brokenhearted; he saves those who are crushed in spirit.” (Psalm 34.18) Remember this: God promises to help you. Jehovah cares deeply about you.
[Quotation] 1 Peter 5.7: while you throw all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you. [End Quotation]
He understands your deepest thoughts and emotions. He can comfort you through His Word, the Bible. And he invites you to pray to him. When you pray, you can ask him to give you the wisdom and strength you need to deal with your situation.
[Quotation] Isaiah 41.10: Do not be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be anxious, for I am your God. I will fortify you, yes, I will help you, I will really hold on to you with my right hand of righteousness.’ [End Quotation]
Domestic abuse will end What the Bible says: “They will dwell, each one under his vine and under his fig tree, and no one will make them afraid.”
[Quotation] Micah 4.4: They will sit* [Footnote] or dwell [End of Footnote], each one under his vine and under his fig tree, And no one will make them afraid, For the mouth of Jehovah of armies has spoken. [End Quotation]
Remember this: The Bible promises a time in the near future when the home will be a peaceful place for everyone. Jehovah God has the only complete and permanent solution to all of our problems. The Bible promises: “He will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore.”
[Quotation] Revelation 21.4: And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.” [End Quotation]
At that time, even bad memories will fade away as they are replaced with good ones.
[Quotation] Isaiah 65.17: For look! I am creating new heavens and a new earth; And the former things will not be called to mind, Nor will they come up into the heart. [End Quotation]
This is the peaceful future that the Bible offers you.
[Box] How you can help a victim. Do you know someone who is a victim of domestic abuse? Even if you are not a trained professional, you may be able to help her.
Listen empathetically.
[Quotation] James 1.19: Know this, my beloved brothers: Everyone must be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger, [End Quotation]
Tell her that you are willing to listen, but do not push her to talk. Reassure her that you believe what she says.
[Quotation] Proverbs 20.5: The thoughts of a man’s heart are like deep waters, But the discerning man draws them out. [End Quotation]
One domestic violence resource says: “It will have taken a lot for her to talk to you. [Victims] are much more likely to cover up or downplay the abuse, rather than to make it up or exaggerate. You might find it hard to imagine someone you know could behave abusively. But the person who is abusive will probably show you a very different side [from] the side the victim sees.”
Speak encouragingly.
[Quotation] 1 Thessalonians 5.11: Therefore, keep encouraging one another and building one another up, just as you are in fact doing. [End Quotation]
Use your words to build her self-worth. Tell her that you care about her. Remind her of her good qualities. And encourage her to get help.
Offer support.
[Quotation] Proverbs 17.17: A true friend shows love at all times And is a brother who is born for times of distress. [End Quotation]
Give her practical assistance, such as watching her children for a short time or providing a meal. Verify that she has a safety plan, including a place to go in case of an emergency.
Build up her confidence in her ability to make her own decisions.
[Quotation] Galatians 6.5: For each one will carry his own load. [End Quotation]
Provide her with information, and talk about possible options. But do not tell her what she should do.
If you are concerned about a victim of the opposite sex, it is best to limit the help you personally provide and encourage her to seek help from a trusted female friend. [End of Box] [End of More Topics article] [Click to close]
Question 5. According to 1 Peter 3.7, how should a husband treat his wife?
5. Read 1 Peter 3.7. Jehovah commands husbands to honor their wife. Honor refers to the way we treat someone whom we respect. A husband who honors his wife will treat her in a kind and loving way. In this article, we will consider how a husband can show honor to his wife. But first, let us discuss the kind of conduct that dishonors wives.
[Read scripture] 1 Peter 3.7: You husbands, in the same way, continue dwelling with them according to knowledge. Assign them honor as to a weaker vessel, the feminine one, since they are also heirs with you of the undeserved favor of life, in order for your prayers not to be hindered. [End of Read scripture]
Reject Conduct That Dishonors Your Wife
Question 6. How does Jehovah feel about men who physically abuse their wife? (Colossians 3.19)
6. Being physically abusive. Jehovah hates anyone who is violent.
[Quotation] Psalm 11.5: Jehovah examines the righteous one as well as the wicked one; He hates anyone who loves violence. [End Quotation]
He specifically condemns husbands who abuse their wife.
[Quotation] Malachi 2.16: For I hate divorce,” says Jehovah the God of Israel, “and the one who covers his garment with violence,” says Jehovah of armies. “And guard yourselves respecting your spirit, and you must not deal treacherously. [End Quotation]
(Read Colossians 3.19) According to our theme scripture, 1 Peter 3.7, if a husband does not treat his wife well, his relationship with God will be affected. Jehovah may not even listen to his prayers.
[Read scripture] Colossians 3.19: You husbands, keep on loving your wives and do not be bitterly angry with them. [End of Read scripture]
Question 7. According to Ephesians 4.31 and 32, what type of speech must husbands avoid? (See also “Expression Explained.”)
7. Being verbally abusive. Some husbands abuse their wife with angry words and hurtful speech. But Jehovah hates “anger, wrath, screaming, and abusive speech.”* [Footnote] Expression Explained: “Abusive speech” includes degrading name-calling and harsh and relentless criticism. Any speech that is malicious, demeaning, or insulting is considered to be abusive. [End of footnote] (Read Ephesians 4.31 and 32.) He hears everything. The way a husband speaks to his wife, even in the privacy of their home, matters to Jehovah. A husband who speaks harshly to his wife damages not only his marriage but also his friendship with God.
[Quotation] James 1.26: If any man thinks he is a worshipper of God but does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he is deceiving his own heart, and his worship is futile. [End Quotation]
[Read scripture] Ephesians 4.31 and 32: Put away from yourselves every kind of malicious bitterness, anger, wrath, screaming, and abusive speech, as well as everything injurious. 32 But become kind to one another, tenderly compassionate, freely forgiving one another just as God also by Christ freely forgave you. [End of Read scripture]
Question 8. How does Jehovah feel about pornography, and why?
8. Viewing pornography. How does Jehovah feel about pornography? He hates it. So a husband who views unclean images damages his relationship with Jehovah and degrades his wife.* [Footnote] See on jw.org and in JW Library the article “Pornography Can Shatter Your Marriage.” [End of footnote]
Jehovah expects a husband to remain loyal to his wife not only in actions but also in thoughts. Jesus said that a man who looks at another woman in a passionate way has already committed adultery “in his heart.”* [Footnote] A wife whose husband views pornography would benefit from the article “When a Marriage Mate Views Pornography” in the August 2023 issue of The Watchtower. [End of footnote]
[Quotation] Matthew 5.28 and 29: But I say to you that everyone who keeps on looking at a woman so as to have a passion for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If, now, your right eye is making you stumble, tear it out and throw it away from you. For it is better for you to lose one of your members than for your whole body to be pitched into Gehenna. [End Quotation]
[Click to Read]|[Help for the Family article] Pornography Can Shatter Your Marriage. His wife discovered his secret. He apologized profusely. He promised to stop, and he did, for a while. Then he relapsed, and the cycle started all over again. Are you in a similar situation? If so, you need to realize how your pornography habit is affecting your spouse and how you can quit the practice once and for all. [Footnote] Although this article addresses husbands, the principles discussed also apply to wives who view pornography. [End of Footnote]
What you should know. Pornography can shatter a marriage. It promotes resentment and fosters mistrust on the part of the innocent mate. [Footnote] Some married couples claim that viewing pornography together can enhance their relationship. However, that practice is not in harmony with Bible principles.
[Quotation] Proverbs 5.15 through 20: Drink water from your own cistern And flowing water from your own well. 16 Should your springs be dispersed outside, Your streams of water in the public squares? 17 Let them be for you alone, And not for strangers with you. 18 May your own fountain be blessed, And may you rejoice with the wife of your youth, 19 A loving doe, a graceful mountain goat. Let her breasts satisfy you at all times. May you be captivated by her love constantly. 20 So why, my son, should you be captivated by a wayward woman Or embrace the bosom of an immoral woman? [End Quotation]
[Quotation] 1 Corinthians 13.4 and 5: Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous. It does not brag, does not get puffed up, 5 does not behave indecently, does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked. It does not keep account of the injury. [End Quotation]
[Quotation] Galatians 5.22 and 23: On the other hand, the fruitage of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, 23 mildness, self-control. Against such things there is no law. [End Quotation] [End of Footnote]
A wife whose husband looks at pornography may experience the following feelings:
Betrayal. A wife named Sarah says, “It’s as if my husband had committed adultery again and again.”
Inadequacy. One wife says that her husband’s pornography habit left her feeling “ugly and ashamed.”
Mistrust. “I am suspicious of my husband’s every move,” says a wife named Helen.
Anxiety. A wife named Catherine admits, “Worrying about my husband’s habit consumed my life.”
To think about: The Bible tells a husband to love his wife.
[Quotation] Ephesians 5.25: Husbands, continue loving your wives, just as the Christ also loved the congregation and gave himself up for it, [End Quotation]
Is he doing that if he subjects her to the effects listed above?
What you can do. The practice of viewing pornography is not easy to quit. “My husband gave up cigarettes, marijuana, and alcohol,” says a wife named Stacey, “but he still struggles with pornography.” If you are in that situation, the following suggestions can help you to quit the habit once and for all. Understand why pornography is bad. Pornography promotes selfish gratification, which undermines the love, trust, and loyalty that are necessary for a happy marriage. It also shows disrespect for the Creator of marriage, Jehovah God. Bible principle: “Let marriage be honorable.”
[Quotation] Hebrews 13.4: Let marriage be honorable among all, and let the marriage bed be without defilement, for God will judge sexually immoral people and adulterers. [End Quotation]
Take responsibility for your actions. Do not say, ‘I wouldn’t need pornography if my wife were more affectionate.’ Shifting the blame to your wife is unfair, and it merely gives you a convenient excuse to relapse when she disappoints you. Bible principle: “Each one is tried by being drawn out and enticed by his own desire.” (James 1.14)
Be open and honest with your spouse. A husband named Kevin says: “I check in with my wife daily. Did I give a second glance to something provocative, or did I avoid it? This constant communication removes all secrecy.” Bible principle: “We wish to conduct ourselves honestly in all things.”
[Quotation] Hebrews 13.18: Keep praying for us, for we trust we have an honest conscience, as we wish to conduct ourselves honestly in all things. [End Quotation]
Remain vigilant. A relapse can occur even after years of supposedly conquering the habit. Kevin, quoted earlier, says: “I resisted pornography for ten years and convinced myself that my problem was over. But the addiction was lying dormant, waiting for the right circumstances to rear its ugly head.” Bible principle: “Let the one who thinks he is standing beware that he does not fall.” (1 Corinthians 10.12)
When you are tempted, wait. While you may not be able to prevent the craving, you can choose whether or not you will act on it. The desire will pass, perhaps even faster if you learn to redirect your thinking to other activities. Bible principle: “Each one of you should know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not with greedy, uncontrolled sexual passion.”
[Quotation] 1 Thessalonians 4.4 and 5: Each one of you should know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, 5 not with greedy, uncontrolled sexual passion like the nations have that do not know God. [End Quotation]
Avoid circumstances that might trigger a relapse. “Once you’re in a vulnerable situation,” says the book Willpower’s Not Enough, “you’ve lit a match. All it takes is a little fuel . . . to light the fire.” Bible principle: “May nothing wicked dominate me.”
[Quotation] Psalm 119.133: Guide my steps safely by your saying; May nothing wicked dominate me. [End Quotation]
Do not lose hope. It can take a long time, even years, to restore your mate’s trust. But experience shows that it is possible. Bible principle: “Love is patient.”
[Quotation] 1 Corinthians 13.4: Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous. It does not brag, does not get puffed up, [End Quotation]
[Box] If your husband watches porn. Do not blame yourself. Do not conclude that you are undesirable, unattractive, or inadequate. No woman can satisfy the insatiable and often unnatural cravings that pornography creates in its viewers. Can you help your husband regain your trust? Perhaps you can, especially if he is making a genuine effort to quit. A wife named Felicia helps her husband recognize his triggers and maintain his strategies. She says: “I know this is my husband’s problem, not mine. But by helping him, I’ve helped our marriage.”
[Quotation] Ecclesiastes 4.9 through 12: Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their hard work. 10 For if one of them falls, the other can help his partner up. But what will happen to the one who falls with no one to help him up? 11 Moreover, if two lie down together, they will stay warm, but how can just one keep warm? 12 And someone may overpower one alone, but two together can take a stand against him. And a threefold cord cannot quickly be torn apart. [End Quotation]
[End of Box] [End of Help for the Family article] [Click to close]
Question 9. Why does Jehovah hate it when a husband is sexually demeaning toward his wife?
9. Being sexually demeaning. Some husbands pressure their wife to engage in sexual acts that are demeaning and that make her feel unclean or unloved. Jehovah hates such cold and thoughtless behavior. He expects a husband to love and cherish his wife and to respect her feelings.
[Quotation] Ephesians 5.28 and 29: In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. A man who loves his wife loves himself, 29 for no man ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cherishes it, just as the Christ does the congregation, [End Quotation]
What if a Christian husband is already demeaning or abusive toward his wife or views pornography? How can he change his thinking and actions?
How to Overcome Dishonorable Conduct
Question 10. How can husbands benefit from Jesus’ example?
10. What can help a husband to overcome abusive and demeaning behavior? He can strive to imitate Jesus. Although Jesus never married, the way he treated his disciples is a model for how a husband should treat his wife.
[Quotation] Ephesians 5.25: Husbands, continue loving your wives, just as the Christ also loved the congregation and gave himself up for it, [End Quotation]
For example, consider what husbands can learn from the way Jesus treated his apostles and from the way he spoke to them.
Question 11. How did Jesus treat his apostles?
11. Jesus treated his apostles in a kind and dignified way. He was never harsh or domineering. Although he was their Lord and Master, Jesus did not feel the need to prove his authority over them through displays of power. Instead, he humbly served them.
[Quotation] John 13.12 through 17: When, now, he had washed their feet and had put his outer garments on, he again reclined at the table and said to them: “Do you understand what I have done to you? 13 You address me as ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and you are correct, for I am such. 14 Therefore, if I, the Lord and Teacher, washed your feet, you also should wash the feet of one another. 15 For I set the pattern for you, that just as I did to you, you should also do. 16 Most truly I say to you, a slave is not greater than his master, nor is one who is sent greater than the one who sent him. 17 If you know these things, happy you are if you do them. [End Quotation]
He told his disciples: “Learn from me, for I am mild-tempered and lowly in heart, and you will find refreshment for yourselves.”
[Quotation] Matthew 11.28 through 30: Come to me, all you who are toiling and loaded down, and I will refresh you. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am mild-tempered and lowly in heart, and you will find refreshment for yourselves. 30 For my yoke is kindly, and my load is light.” [End Quotation]
Note that Jesus was mild-tempered. A mild person is not weak. Rather, he has the inner strength to show restraint. When provoked, he remains calm and in control of his emotions.
Question 12. How did Jesus speak to others?
12. Jesus used his words to comfort and refresh others. He did not speak harshly to his followers.
[Quotation] Luke 8.47 and 48: Seeing that she had not escaped notice, the woman came trembling and fell down before him and declared before all the people why she touched him and how she was healed immediately. 48 But he said to her: “Daughter, your faith has made you well. Go in peace.” [End Quotation]
Even when opposers insulted him and tried to provoke him, “he did not insult in return.”
[Quotation] 1 Peter 2.21 through 23: In fact, to this course you were called, because even Christ suffered for you, leaving a model for you to follow his steps closely. 22 He committed no sin, nor was deception found in his mouth. 23 When he was being insulted, he did not insult in return. When he was suffering, he did not threaten, but he entrusted himself to the One who judges righteously. [End Quotation]
At times, Jesus even chose to remain silent rather than reply harshly.
[Quotation] Matthew 27.12 through 14: But while he was being accused by the chief priests and elders, he made no answer. 13 Then Pilate said to him: “Do you not hear how many things they are testifying against you?” 14 But he did not answer him, no, not a word, so that the governor was very surprised. [End Quotation]
What an excellent example for Christian husbands!
Question 13. As stated at Matthew 19.4 through 6, how can a husband “stick to his wife”? (See also picture.)
13. Jesus instructed husbands to remain loyal to their wife. He quoted his Father, who said that a husband should “stick to his wife.” (Read Matthew 19.4 through 6.) The Greek verb used in that passage for “stick to” literally means “to glue.” Therefore, the marital bond between a husband and a wife should be so strong that it is as if they were glued together. Their bond cannot be broken without damaging both of them. A husband who develops such a bond with his wife will reject all forms of pornography. He will immediately turn away from “looking at what is worthless.”
[Quotation] Psalm 119.37: Turn my eyes away from looking at what is worthless; Preserve me alive in your way. [End Quotation]
In effect, he makes a contract with his eyes not to look passionately at any woman other than his wife.
[Quotation] Job 31.1: “I have made a covenant with my eyes. So how could I show improper attention to a virgin? [End Quotation]
[Read scripture] Matthew 19.4 through 6: In reply he said: “Have you not read that the one who created them from the beginning made them male and female 5 and said: ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and his mother and will stick to his wife, and the two will be one flesh’? So that they are no longer two, but one flesh. 6 Therefore, what God has yoked together, let no man put apart.” [End of Read scripture]
[Image Alt:] A brother working in an auto repair shop. He refuses to join his coworkers in viewing pornographic magazines. Picture Description: A brother’s non-Witness coworkers try to get him to look at their pornographic magazine. Caption: A loyal husband refuses to look at pornography
Question 14. What steps should an abusive husband take to repair his relationship with Jehovah and with his wife?
14. A husband who physically or verbally abuses his wife needs to take additional steps to repair his relationship with Jehovah and with his wife. What are these steps? First, he recognizes that he has a serious problem. Nothing is hidden from Jehovah’s sight.
[Quotation] Psalm 44.21: Will not God discover this? He is aware of the secrets of the heart. [End Quotation]
[Quotation] Ecclesiastes 12.14: For the true God will judge every deed, including every hidden thing, as to whether it is good or bad. [End Quotation]
[Quotation] Hebrews 4.13: And there is not a creation that is hidden from his sight, but all things are naked and openly exposed to the eyes of the one to whom we must give an account. [End Quotation]
Second, he stops abusing his wife and changes his behavior.
[Quotation] Proverbs 28.13: The one covering over his transgressions will not succeed, But whoever confesses and abandons them will be shown mercy. [End Quotation]
Third, he apologizes to his wife and to Jehovah and seeks their forgiveness.
[Quotation] Acts 3.19: “Repent, therefore, and turn around so as to get your sins blotted out, so that seasons of refreshing may come from Jehovah himself [End Quotation]
He should also beg Jehovah for both the desire to change and the help to control his thoughts, speech, and actions.
[Quotation] Psalm 51.10 through 12: Create in me a pure heart, O God, And put within me a new spirit, a steadfast one. 11 Do not cast me out from your presence; And do not take your holy spirit away from me. 12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation; Stir within me a willingness to obey you. [End Quotation]
[Quotation] 2 Corinthians 10.5: For we are overturning reasonings and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are bringing every thought into captivity to make it obedient to the Christ; [End Quotation]
[Quotation] Philippians 2.13: For God is the one who for the sake of his good pleasure energizes you, giving you both the desire and the power to act. [End Quotation]
Fourth, he acts in harmony with his prayers by learning to hate all forms of violence and abusive speech.
[Quotation] Psalm 97.10: O you who love Jehovah, hate what is bad. He is guarding the lives of his loyal ones; He rescues them from the hand of the wicked. [End Quotation]
Fifth, he seeks immediate help from loving shepherds in the congregation.
[Quotation] James 5.14 through 16: Is there anyone sick among you? Let him call the elders of the congregation to him, and let them pray over him, applying oil to him in the name of Jehovah. 15 And the prayer of faith will make the sick one well, and Jehovah will raise him up. Also, if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. 16 Therefore, openly confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, so that you may be healed. A righteous man’s supplication has a powerful effect. [End Quotation]
Sixth, he develops a plan that will help him to avoid all such behavior in the future. A husband who views pornography should follow these same steps. Jehovah will bless his efforts to change his behavior.
[Quotation] Psalm 37.5: Commit your way to Jehovah; Rely on him, and he will act in your behalf. [End Quotation]
But it is not enough for a husband to reject dishonorable conduct. He also needs to learn to show honor to his wife. How can he do that?
How to Honor Your Wife
Question 15. How can a husband show affection for his wife?
15. Show affection. Some happily married brothers make it a habit to do something every day to show their wife how much they love her.
[Quotation] 1 John 3.18: Little children, we should love, not in word or with the tongue, but in deed and truth. [End Quotation]
A husband may show tender affection for his wife in small ways, such as by holding her hand or giving her a warm embrace. He may send her a text message and tell her “I miss you” or ask “How is your day going?” From time to time, he may express his love for her by writing some well-chosen words on a card. When a husband does these things, he honors his wife and strengthens their marriage.
Question 16. Why should a husband praise his wife?
16. Express appreciation. A husband who honors his wife builds her up and encourages her. One way he does this is by remembering to show appreciation for all that she does to support him.
[Quotation] Colossians 3.15: Also, let the peace of the Christ rule in your hearts, for you were called to that peace in one body. And show yourselves thankful. [End Quotation]
When a husband sincerely praises his wife, he warms her heart. She will feel secure, loved, and honored.
[Quotation] Proverbs 31.28: Her children rise up and declare her happy; Her husband rises up and praises her. [End Quotation]
Question 17. How can a husband show respect for his wife?
17. Be kind and respectful. A husband who loves his wife values and cherishes her. He views her as a priceless gift from Jehovah.
[Quotation] Proverbs 18.22: The one who finds a good wife has found something good, And he receives Jehovah’s favor. [End Quotation]
[Quotation] Proverbs 31.10: Who can find a capable wife? Her value is far more than that of corals. [End Quotation]
As a result, he treats her kindly and respectfully, even during the more intimate and private aspects of marriage. He will not pressure her to engage in sexual acts that make her feel uncomfortable, that are demeaning, or that bother her conscience.* [Footnote] The Bible does not provide details as to what sexual practices between a husband and a wife should be considered clean or unclean. A Christian couple must make decisions that reflect their resolve to honor Jehovah, to please each other, and to maintain a clean conscience. Generally speaking, a couple would not discuss with others this intimate aspect of their marriage. [End of footnote] He too will strive to maintain a clean conscience before Jehovah.
[Quotation] Acts 24.16: Because of this I always strive to maintain a clear conscience before God and men. [End Quotation]
Question 18. What should husbands be determined to do? (See also the box “Four Ways to Be a Respectful Husband.”)
18. Husbands, you can be sure that Jehovah sees and appreciates your efforts to honor your wife in all aspects of your life. Be determined to honor her by avoiding dishonorable conduct and by being kind, respectful, and affectionate to her. In doing so, you show her that you love and value her. Honor your wife, and you will protect your most important relationship, your friendship with Jehovah.
[Quotation] Psalm 25.14: Close friendship with Jehovah belongs to those who fear him, And he makes his covenant known to them. [End Quotation]
[Box]
Four Ways to Be a Respectful Husband. Christians must be gracious when dealing with others.
[Quotation] Colossians 4.6: Let your words always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you will know how you should answer each person. [End Quotation]
How can a husband apply that counsel when speaking to or about his wife?
1. Imitate Jehovah by speaking politely, using such words as “please” and “thank you.”
[Quotation] Genesis 13.14: Jehovah said to Abram, after Lot had separated from him: “Raise your eyes, please, and look from the place where you are, to the north and south, east and west, [End Quotation]
[Quotation] Genesis 15.5: He now brought him outside and said: “Look up, please, to the heavens and count the stars, if you are able to do so.” Then he said to him: “So your offspring will become.” [End Quotation]
Doing this is more than just being polite. It shows respect for your wife.
2. Praise your wife for the good things she does.
[Quotation] Proverbs 31.28 and 29: Her children rise up and declare her happy; Her husband rises up and praises her. 29 There are many capable women, But you, you surpass them all. [End Quotation]
Avoid revealing her faults to others.
[Quotation] Psalm 50.20: You sit and speak against your own brother; You reveal the faults of your own mother’s son. [End Quotation]
3. “Be quick to listen, slow to speak.”
[Quotation] James 1.19: Know this, my beloved brothers: Everyone must be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger, [End Quotation]
4. Speak in a mild manner even when discussing emotionally charged topics.
[Quotation] Colossians 3.8: But now you must put them all away from you: wrath, anger, badness, abusive speech, and obscene talk out of your mouth. [End Quotation]
[Quotation] Colossians 3.12: Accordingly, as God’s chosen ones, holy and loved, clothe yourselves with the tender affections of compassion, kindness, humility, mildness, and patience. [End Quotation][End of box]
[Image Alt:] A husband speaking lovingly to his wife.
[Image Alt:] Collage: 1. The husband shown in the previous image praises his wife while speaking with others. 2. He listens attentively as his wife shares her feelings with him.
[Box] How Can a Husband Apply the Counsel Found At ...
Colossians 3.19?
[Quotation] Colossians 3.19: You husbands, keep on loving your wives and do not be bitterly angry with them. [End Quotation]
Ephesians 4.31 and 32?
[Quotation] Ephesians 4.31 and 32: Put away from yourselves every kind of malicious bitterness, anger, wrath, screaming, and abusive speech, as well as everything injurious. 32 But become kind to one another, tenderly compassionate, freely forgiving one another just as God also by Christ freely forgave you. [End Quotation]
Matthew 19.4 through 6?
[Quotation] Matthew 19.4 through 6: In reply he said: “Have you not read that the one who created them from the beginning made them male and female 5 and said: ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and his mother and will stick to his wife, and the two will be one flesh’? 6 So that they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has yoked together, let no man put apart.” [End Quotation] [End of box]
Song 131 “What God Has Yoked Together” Based on Matthew 19.5 and 6
1. With dignity and joy,
A threefold cord is bound.
With God and men to witness,
These sacred vows resound.
He vowed before Jehovah
To love her from the heart.
“What God has yoked together,
Let no man put apart.”
2. They both have searched God’s Word
To learn to do his will,
And now they seek his blessing,
Their promise to fulfill.
She vowed before Jehovah
To love him from the heart.
“What God has yoked together,
Let no man put apart.”
[End of Song. Press Play below to play this song with Audio Description]
Secondary Articles in The Watchtower (1 Article)
Study Tip. Drawing to Aid Memory
Study Tip. Drawing to Aid Memory
Perhaps, like many of us, you find it hard to remember what you study. Yet, have you noticed how Jesus’ illustrations come readily to mind? You can visualize them in your mind’s eye, and that helps you to remember them. Likewise, you can remember more of what you study by creating visual images. How might you do that? By drawing pictures as you learn.
People who draw pictures of new things learned often remember them better. They find that this method works not only with individual words but also with abstract ideas and concepts. Their pictures are not works of art, just simple, brief sketches. And evidence shows that older people can especially benefit from this technique.
The next time you study, you may want to try drawing some pictures of what you have learned. You might be surprised at how much you remember!